Categories
Uncategorized

Boujie on a budget – Preparing for a baby without breaking the bank

‘Babies are expensive’, ‘wait until you have your own child and see how much it costs’. These are the most common phrases we often hear throughout our adult lives and while there are costs to account for, potential loss of income etc. However, having a baby doesn’t need to set you back hundreds and thousands of pounds. You can do it the cost-effective way and still have some money set aside for yourself, date nights or a cheeky holiday. 

According to the money advice service, the average cost of having a baby in the first month is an eye watering £503.54!!!!!! I don’t know if it’s just me being frugal but this cost is ridiculous. I’ve spoken about this topic numerous times on my social media page as I feel that we live in an excessive society. Our very culture is closely linked with our consumer identity which can be very problematic. Now don’t get me wrong, if you are the type of parent who loves to shop and has the disposable income to buy your child unlimited products or the best of everything then so be it. However, I’m going to explain how to approach this from an alternative angle and to really understand that becoming a parent doesn’t always have to be about losing out or stressing yourself about buying enough, is it the best quality etc. 

As I became older, I begun to realise that living materialistically was not really me. I do enjoy nice things however I like to be smart and sensible with my finances and travelling has always been my financial priority (maybe this is why I don’t own my own house yet lol). My money saving journey began when someone recommended the website freecycle to me which sounded amazing and has been a great resource over the years. I once was able to source over £300 in quality furniture for a friend to redecorate their house. So, when I found out that I was pregnant I knew that I wanted to save as much money as possible. Friends along the years would tell me the price that they paid for products and I would almost keel over at the cost. How could a tiny person be so expensive! 

I’m going to breakdown what I have purchased for my baby so far and I will include any links or pages that I found helpful along this ‘Boujie on a budget’ journey and hopefully you can save yourself a pretty penny as well!


Essentials: 

Chico next to me sleeper cot 

RRP: £126-219 

Paid: £60 from Facebook Marketplace. (begrudgingly, and only because it came in the original packaging with a mattress cover) 

Maxi Cosi Cabriofix car seat 

RRP: £94- 194 

Paid: £30 from Facebook Marketplace 

Now take caution when purchasing second hand car seats to ensure that they meet the safety guidelines, I’ll include a checklist at the end. 

 
Clothing 
eBay has been my best friend in buying second hand clothes, after all the baby is going to grow out of their clothes so quickly it really is not worth the added expense that can quickly get out of hand. I was able to purchase a bundle of around 5 bits, including a Ralph Lauren top/vest for £3!!!.  

Instagram has been a saving grace surprisingly and I have used one page in particular who sell second hand baby bits. These were the first bits I had brought for the baby and the quality has been amazing.  

@buybabyy_ sells second hand baby clothes as well as the occasional accessories of footwear at a fraction of the original RRP. I paid £10 for a pair of Nike crib shoes and also £12 for a bundle from The White Company which usually retails at £60+. 

You can do a quick search on Instagram to find similar accounts that offer a similar service in your local area to keep postage fees down.  

Prams and other bits 

If you don’t have Facebook by now then I recommend you set up an account while your pregnant, their marketplace feature has tons of deals on a daily basis and I was able to secure some amazing bargains 

Sleepyhead  

Sleepyhead Deluxe+ Pod Pristine White

RRP: £115 – £150 (depending on design) 

Paid: £50 from Facebook Marketplace 

The one that we got came in the original packaging and looked brand new. I will give it a wash before baby arrives.  

ICandy Peach  

RRP: £1,170 

Paid: £500 from a deal arranged through a friend. The lady was going to sell online and we got first refusal.  

Now this is my favourite deal as I knew I wanted an I Candy pram but I was not prepared (or could afford) to pay over £500 for a pram. I just paid £600 for a car so there is no way that I would spend that kind of money on a pram. This came with: 

  • The main frame 
  • The bassinet  
  • The pram seat 
  • All the adaptors (2 pairs) 
  • Both rain covers (for bassinet and normal seat) 
  • A Maxi Cosi car seat 

Safety 

When buying a second hand car seat you ideally want to buy it from someone you know. Check the recall list for that make and model and ideally buy one that still has the original box, leaflet etc. You don’t want to buy a second hand car seat from a car boot sale but with the right precautions you can get yourself a good deal. In my case, the woman did not drive and only had a car seat for when her baby was out with her grandmother. Do your own research in this area and make an informed decision based on the deal that is offered to you and how much details you can validate on a case by case basis.  

These were the main discounts that I have been able to secure so far and feel free to share this post or comment any suggestions or major savings you have made for your own family so far! 
 

www.freecycle.com
 https://www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/blog/what-is-the-average-cost-to-have-a-baby

Categories
Uncategorized

Mental Barriers: Health Anxiety

1 in 4

will experience a mental health problem of some kind each year in England

39.9%

people receive treatment

6 in 100

people suffer with general anxiety disorder

Mental prison

I have lost count on the amount of times that I am absolutely convinced that I have an incurable disease or some illness. And today is no different I read just one line of an article on social media and now my focus has switched to that illness. Speaking to people, a lot of people will laugh it off and make light of your paranoia regarding your health but it really is not a laughing matter. Going through this experience can be very isolating and crippling mentally. You end up living in a permanent state of panic which becomes a deep underlying fear that affects every aspect of your life. 

I decided to start writing about my experience with anxiety as it can be quite therapeutic during the worst times when my mind is in overdrive and my thoughts unraveling. Once I finish an article, I tend to feel quite relieved and a bit calmer to carry on with the day. Yet saying that, I don’t have the answer for the best approach in dealing with health anxiety specifically as I have yet to master it. But I’ll give you some examples of the types of statements that go through my mind: 

  • Oh I’m extra thirsty today, does this mean I’m ill. 
  • That feels like a headache, that’s odd I don’t usually get headaches. Could it be a bleed on the brain or something else. 
  • Is that a lump, mole, skin cancer etc 
  • WHAT IS NORMAL!!!! 

You hear these kinds horror stories that happen to a friend of a friend. Or some freak health story that you read in the news or social media. These stories are the ones that stay etched into your brain like a mental stain. You can always jump to the worst-case scenario whenever a physical symptom pops up. 

Now I have entered a new phase of my life, going through pregnancy. This should be a happy joyous time in my life but often I just feel overwhelmed with the weight of the worry on my shoulder. It’s one thing worrying about myself but to worry about the health of my child is a nightmare. I do sit and wonder, do other women go through this level of fear. I’m 21 weeks now and this morning I was awake at 5am reading health pages regarding your baby’s movements and when to track them. On this occasion, my google exploration did provide me with some comfort. Once I had read enough information to rationalise my thoughts and convince myself that there was nothing out of the ordinary happening I was able to close down the tab and go back to sleep. Which raises the question, does google help or is it a trigger point? 

In my experience, googling symptoms can sometimes help and more times put the fear of god into you. But I have yet to figure out what is a good replacement without having a registered GP on speed dial to talk me through my symptoms. Many anxiety disorders are very similar to the behaviour you often see in OCD sufferers. You develop repetitive behavioural patterns which can keep you trapped in a box and it is these repeat actions that only feed into your anxiety more as it takes away your control. This is the prison that you are stuck within. 

I have often spoken about my experience with CBT therapy and meditation. Luckily for me I have grown to be able to recognise my triggers and understand when I am in a high state of anxiety which allows me to put strategies in place to reduce my stress and anxiety levels. But at times I fail to put these strategies into action and end up suffering for longer than necessary. I always recommend mediation to people as I feel the positive affirmations helps to build confidence within yourself and to maintain a constant state of calm. At my most stressful times I will try: 

Meditation before bedtime 

This helps to offload the worries that I carry throughout the day. I am able to pull them from me like rubbish and dispose of them for that day and I have found that I always sleep better if I meditate before bed. It’s a great support for insomnia (however pregnancy has derailed that lol) 

Mediation in the morning 

This can really help to protect your own mental space as you get up ready to attack the day. Especially if you are about to do something that you know is a difficult task. I work with children so I often meditate to ensure that I can save my energy for myself. And draw on extra positive energy to feed into my students. This way I can leave school at the end of the day without feeling drained of all emotional energy. 

A healthy bedtime routine 

Preparing for bedtime and having a daily routine is something that drastically changed my experience with insomnia. However, this is something that I am not currently doing so I’m not surprised my anxiety levels have been increasing as my sleep has been quite bad recently. 

Exercise 

Now I know that leisure facilities have been closed throughout the lock down and this has affected my level of exercise as I find it hard to motivate myself at home. I did start lock down getting the yoga mat out every day, doing a little bit of yoga or a live class on Instagram but that quickly failed lol. When I am training in the gym, my mood for the rest of the day is just great. You can really feel the endorphins release as the day progresses and this really does help to manage my anxiety on a longer basis. 

This specific form of anxiety can be relentless and tiring but you are not alone in your struggles, there are more of us than you think!

What are some of the techniques you use to help you through this nightmare? Or how have you been able to overcome this issue? Drop a comment below