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Education General

Facing your mental health issues

Finally I have started therapy again which was delayed due to covid. I have discussed in previous blogs how my journey with anxiety has affected me and what I have learnt along the way. But really the truth is when you are dealing with a mental health issue the learning never stops. You think you reach a stage of comfort and safety and life may throw you another curve ball that you then have to adapt to. It is not enough to simply view yourself as a completed work of art there is always room for more growth and lessons to learn. The NHS are quite good in the sense that you can self refer to receive therapy and this means you don’t have to go and face a doctor to explain what you are going through. They have questionnaires that are designed to measure your level of depression and anxiety. If you are unsure of what you are feeling, completing one of those may help in identifying what the problem is or how it affects you the most.

At the start of the year I had begun my journey of self reflection to admit that my recently relapse with weed had affected me more than I cared to admit at the time. You can read about this experience in one of my previous blog posts. I had recognised that my behaviour as changed and now was the time to implement a fail safe measure. Let’s call this stage 2 in self care. (I will explain the stages below)

Over the years of suffering with anxiety I have developed a warming system let’s call it. To use as an indicator of my mental health, a quick way to self diagnose what level of support or intervention I need at that particular time. And to jot it down would look something like this:


Stage 1: Day to day anxiety or a particular situation

This would usually be in the form of a bad day or maybe doing something that triggers my anxiety. When I begin to feel anxious I know I have a toolbox of mechanisms that I can use at that time to minimise my anxiety and my reaction towards it. This includes:

⁃ Breathing exercises

⁃ Meditation

⁃ Listening to music

⁃ Singing out loud (this typically will take me around 3 songs to begin to feel more relaxed)

⁃ Going to sleep

⁃ Discussing my feelings with someone close to me

Stage 2: The point when I notice that my behaviour has/is changing in general

This could include avoiding a specific task or activity, becoming more withdrawn with people close to me or suffering with multiple reoccurring periods of anxiety on a regular basis. I like to think of stage 2 as a stage of growth and being proactive.

⁃ Discuss my feelings and/or behaviour with close friends of family

⁃ Reassess any life changes or events that is contributing towards this change in behaviour

⁃ Maybe seeking outside support or guidance

Stage 3- Full withdrawal and breakdown of mental clarity

I have only reached this stage a few times and if I ignore stage 1 and 2 then it will progress into a full scale withdrawal. This is categorised with withdrawal from all things I enjoy doing, spending time with people, interest in doing anything apart from sleep. This stage will begin to affect my work and may result in me calling in sick a lot or getting signed off from work. And as I said this has only happened a few times and it is not a happy place to be in. I would compare it to depression but not as bad because I still hold some control over my behaviour and hold the ability to change my reality. I feel that depression is more uncontrollable for people.

⁃ Therapy again is always beneficial and there are many forms available

⁃ Some people benefit from medication and don’t feel like you should be judged if this is the path you choose to follow

⁃ Accessing support from those who know you the most. It is often these people that can recognise some of your triggers or unhealthy behaviour

These are just some of the stages I follow for myself but these can be broken down into more stages if you feel that the decline in your mental health goes through more steps.


Mental health issues are often hard to cope with and also provide support for as it is an invisible illness. It can rob you of everything if you allow it too and sometimes you aren’t even in control until it is too late and you find yourself picking up the pieces that was your former life. Just remember though, more people have experienced some form of mental health issue over their life time and in this generation of millennials and even the generations younger than us, sooo many young people are now dealing with anxiety and depression every single day. I really do believe that prevention is better than the cure so the best advice I can give is to practice self care when you can. Exercising, eating healthy, going to bed at a reasonable time all contribute to a healthy mind. Even small things like getting out of bed and making the bed then opening your curtains can set your day down a positive pathway rather than one with a cloud over it. If you have any other tips or suggestions of how to manage or prevent mental health issues from ruining your life then drop a comment to be shared for other people.

I have included some links below that can help you to access support:

http://www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/NHS%20psychological%20therapies%20services%20(IAPT),%20including%20cognitive%20behavioural%20therapy%20(CBT)/LocationSearch/10008

https://www.mind.org.uk/need-urgent-help/using-this-tool/

Tips for everyday living | Mind, the mental health charity – help for mental health problems | Mind, the mental health charity – help for mental health problems

Tips for supporting someone with anxiety – Anxiety UK

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Education Uncategorized

Developing relationships within schools between staff and students

There was a time in my career when I was going through a bad break up. Usually I was good at separating personal issues from my work but it was a vulnerable time for me. I had a registration /tutor group at the time and I’m sure they had to started to notice that I wasn’t myself. Valentine’s Day came around and it was time for me to go and start the lesson with my class. As I walked into the room, they had a massive bunch of flowers on the table for me and a card. I opened the card which was from them all and it read… we will appreciate you always. This simple gesture literally made me cry… another thing that I don’t make a habit of at work. Lol. I was so overwhelmed by the kindness of these teenagers. Some of whom I would frequently be in disagreements with regarding their behaviour. When I eventually left that role, they gifted me a scrap book. They had all wrote messages in the book and I was really shocked at some of them. One even said although we have had our disagreements you taught me that my way is not always the right way’. And I thought wow, the life lessons I gave to them actually sunk in. We both learnt from each other during the time I was at the school and they had taught me to be more patience and how to navigate complex issues with young people. And I shared my knowledge with them, sometimes it was a lesson in CV writing and how to assess your own skills. And other days it was supporting them while going through tough friendship problems.

During my time at secondary school, I developed a close bond with a few of my teachers. I suffered from a traumatic experience when I was in year 9 and my tutor, English teacher and Sociology teacher were made aware of this. Not only did they support me through this journey, they also helped to build me back up and realise my full potential. I felt comfortable to approach them when I was feeling vulnerable. Fast forward 14 years and I still keep in contact with the same teachers and they continue to offer me words of wisdom to this day.

Reflecting on this made me think about the relationships between school staff and their students. It has literally been drilled into my head that a gesture like that is hugely inappropriate and that we as staff must try to maintain our professional distance at all times. Don’t get me wrong, we need a certain degree of protection as staff and also so do the students. But at what point did we as a society stop prioritising our children’s emotional needs and need to form relationships. All throughout early schooling, teachers play quite a nurturing role in their students’ lives. They would certainly put their arm around a crying child. But what we see currently is an education system that is quite frankly, dominated by the academy institutions.

Children need support and stability and as teachers and school staff we spend a lot of their time around them. When will we start to support healthy attachments between school students and staff? Schools have high staff turnover which makes it harder for the students to build relationships with the multiple staff they come into contact with. When will we start to treat students as children instead of professional colleagues? I do believe that if staff and students were able to build a more meaningful relationship then students would have more accountability for their actions towards them. 

Schools are fundamental to the development of young people and also families. We need to focus on building a system that supports the connection between schools and their students. The question is…. how do we achieve t